It's easy to say we should give our children more opportunity for free play, that is play without adult guidance or participation, but how do we do that? Having been brought up without the freedom of play of my former generation, it is a difficult thing to undertake. Also, we are in a time where children under the age of 12, and especially under the age of, say, nine, are not generally seen wandering around without an adult. Would we be seen as unfit parents to allow this when no-one else is? This discussion centres around children from 4 (as long as they have older siblings to take care of them) and under the age of 14.
Another obstacle is the fact that we hear about child abductions, rapes and so on and remember specific cases from when we were young. Louise Bell's abduction and the horrifying murder of little James Bulger come to mind. For my parents and many others, it was the highly publicised Beaumont children, aged 9, 7 and 4, whose disappearance from Adelaide's Glenelg Beach in 1966, remains an unsolved mystery today. It could even be argued that this case was a turning point in Australian history where free play is concerned.
We know that evil people are a minority, but we also know that something like this occurring is a very real possibility, albeit small. So, in allowing free play we need to be sensible and mindful of our own fears, but at the same time, not allow those fears to be a complete preventative to free play. I wouldn't send my children off to spend the day at the beach, for example, as, aside from the Beaumont fears, there is the added danger of misadventure. I also wouldn't send them off without my being available to them within walking distance, although there are circumstances where there would be an exception to this rule, such as leaving them at a roller-blading centre for the session.
One woman in the program I mentioned in Part 1, sends her nine-year old son off on the subway in London to go to the other side of the city. He does this quite capably and has done several times. She says it has given him confidence and a sense of responsibility and capability. She has also received a great deal of flack, via her blog, for her free reign.
Now I'm not condoning this--and, personally, I think it's too young and it's too big a city, but there are ways of building up their confidence, resilience and strength of character without going to what might be considered an extreme. It's also important to consider the potential dangers and set the appropriate boundaries, ie, is there a lake in the area? Do you want them to use the public toilets on their own or confer with you first? It's also important that they know the dangers and keep their siblings or friends safe and stay together.
My way is to find a park that is big enough that you can be somewhere in it and not see them for most of the time. I decided on Cleland Wildlife Park for my first 'experiment'. This is fully fenced (for my peace of mind) but is a property of some 35 hectares. There are several areas to explore and there is a lake. It is a place big enough that they could become lost but would easily find their way back. As a bonus, they are given a map, which my eldest volunteers to be in charge of. If the park you choose doesn't have a map--I recommend you print one off from Google maps as it really added to their experience. The map was part of their exploration and formed part of the negotiation skills they required.
Now, I have to admit--my four kids, the youngest of which is four, have been there a few times before so the area isn't new to them (brave of me, I know, but, hey, you've got to start somewhere). I figure that this is better for them also because they won't be nervous about walking further and further away from where I have set up to do some research.
So they set off. The 12 year old has the map in hand and they've all agreed on where they'll go first. Good start. They've also got a watch so that they know when to come back and a bag of food for the animals. As they walk off, I wonder if the woman sitting at a nearby picnic table, thinks I'm irresponsible. We'll see.
An hour and a half later, they return, excited and jubilant that they have successfully found their way around and enjoyed themselves at the same time. They are beaming and talk excitedly about the animals they saw and fed. After a quick drink and snack, they take off again, in the opposite direction this time, to find the wombats and rock wallabies. On reflection, I think this is a great exercise as it helped them to work together. I think they realised that if they didn't co-operate with each other, that this would directly impinge on their experience as there was no adult to whinge to or to sort out squabbles. It was also good in that they planned their own experience and negotiated the best means. I will definitely do this again! (And not just because I got some work done!!)
Carrick Hill is another example of a great place to let the kids explore. This is a grand old mansion in the Adelaide foothills with sweeping landscaped grounds and large open, native areas. There are scrubby areas where they can play hide and seek, cowboys and Indians or ball games. There are boundaries to be set whereby they need to walk with care in the manicured garden area and near the small lake. There are also paths to explore with signposts from popular children's stories, such as Wind in the Willows and Charlotte's Web, requiring them to read and look for objects or answer questions. As mentioned before, I would print out a map and might even give them a picnic to manage themselves as this would require them to co-operate and negotiate amongst themselves as to who carries what, where they will have it and who does the serving.
Belair National Park is another option. This is very big, and has a lake, so I would mark a boundary on the map and issue a time limit for when they need to return. They could take scooters, balls, a Frisbee and some food for the ducks and decide amongst themselves what they want to do there. I'm not prepared to drop them off at a park and leave them--I would always be set up somewhere so that if something happened, they knew I was there and could return to me sooner if necessary.
So, promote free play. Your children will enjoy it and benefit immensely. They will feel enriched by the experience with a sense of being accomplished, responsible and trusted.
Copyright: Tracey Vale 2011
No comments:
Post a Comment